Thursday, November 24, 2016

Single for the Holidays

I've always been one to do my best to limit Christmas things to the month of December as much as possible. Obviously, that doesn't work with everything, but as much as I can I do. It's just the way I've always done it. So, it seems a little strange to me that the post coming to mind right now relates to a topic that seems to come up often around Christmas.

In this time of Christmas parties, and New Year's parties, and other gatherings it often seems people feel compelled to bring up the topic of my singleness. I don't know why I'll get more questions in the next month and a half than I will the rest of the year, but if this year follows the pattern of every other year, I will.

Most of the time, the question is asked innocently enough. And the person asking doesn't realize how many people have asked. But, that doesn't stop it from getting tiring to be constantly asked and have to answer it.

The hardest part of all of it is that this is the time of year I seem to be more aware of my singleness than other times. Always RSVPing to my work Christmas party for just one. Going to other holiday functions alone.

I think that's what can make continually being asked about it more difficult. It's just another reminder that my life doesn't look like I hoped it would, in a season full of them.

I've debated about posting this, because I don't want to come across as negative, or make it sound like my life is all hard. But, there are times when I run into situations where some extra understanding from both sides is needed. From me when I get asked again - and from the person asking, who might now even know how many times I've been asked recently.

I think at the core of this is really understanding and living from the understanding that our identity goes far beyond their marital status. I've said it before and I'll keep saying it - we can't define people by their marital status. Yes, it's a part of who they are, but it's definitely not all.

Every person is so much more than that, and we need to operate from that belief. When we do, it changes how interact with one another - regardless of the situation.

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