When Words Hold You Back

"How can you pray for me when my prayer need is about my marriage and you've never been married?"

It's a question I was asked about 15 years ago, as I was part of a prayer team. And a question I've never forgotten.

I don't remember how I answered that night. But I did pray for this person.

And then it took another 10 years before I allowed myself to be in a position like that again.

I walked away from that conversation doubting whether I could or should step into what I felt like God was calling me to. I questioned if I should wait until I was married to step into ministry outside of with children and youth. I questioned if I was even allowed to be involved in adult ministry before I was married, or at least had many, many more decades of life experience.

I never told anyone about this experience. I never voiced my doubts or questions to anyone. I just held onto them. I was held back for years by this one question I was asked. I don't remember who said those words, but they had a profound impact on my life for years.

I wonder what stories you could tell about the impact of someone's words on your life. The impact could be good or it could hold us back. The challenge is that we're more likely to remember the words that us to question and doubt, the words that hold us back.

That's what happened to me. I know at the same time as I heard the words above, there were words spoken to me that encouraged and affirmed me in stepping out. But, I don't remember those words clearly. In the presence of doubt, they quickly lost their power.

If you've made it this far into the post, I wonder is you relate?

As you've read my experience maybe your own experience has come to mind.

What are the words that have been spoken over you or to you that have held you back?

What are the experiences in your past that have made you decide to stay back in the shadows rather than stepping into what you know God is prompting you to do?

There is good news. We don't have to live by these words and experiences. We can live free of them.

I know it's possible, because it's been my experience. It takes a choice to do the work of changing your thinking and learn what the truth is, what God says about you. But it is possible.

It starts with exactly where my questions have brought you. We have to start with acknowledging the words and experiences. We're often not aware of them, so we ask God to show us.

Once we're aware and acknowledge them, healing begins. We ask God to speak His truth the those lies we've been believing. Then we regularly remind ourselves of the truth until we actually believe it. And we step out and do what we've been hiding from. 

I still remember the first night I put myself back in a similar role - praying for people who requested it. I made a commitment to do it and stepped back in. Choosing to believe the truth that God wanted me there and He would equip me for it.

So, what do you do next?

Ask God for His truth to believe, instead of the lies that's been holding you back.

Remind yourself of the truth regularly. Keep doing it until you start believing it.

Step in. Do it with shaky hands and a quivering voice. But do it.

If you're overwhelmed or not sure how to move on, talk to someone. Tell them your story about what happened, what was said that is holding you back. Ask them to pray for you. Ask them to help you take the first step.