i'm trying so hard to stop trying so hard

I've had a line to a song running throuhg my head for the last week. I can't remember the song or who it is by, but there's one line that I cannot get out of my heard: "I'm trying so hard to stop trying so hard". Looking at those words in print makes them sound even more confusing than when you just hear them. It doesn't seem quite right to put them together like that.

I think they have a good application to our lives though. How often do we try to change something in our lives by our strength to make our lives more pleasing to God? How often do we read Scripture and see in it nothing more than a list of things we should do or shouldn't do, so that our lives are pleasing to God? I think that's probably our default way of reading the Word and spending time with God.

But, I wonder if there's more. If there should be more to it. I think these words sum it up so well: "I'm trying so hard to stop trying so hard." We try so hard to get things right in our lives by what we do, when maybe we need to trop trying so hard. Maybe we just need to learn how to spend time with God without seeking to come away with something we need to do.

And learning to do will probably be a challenge on our part. We want lists and things to do, but sometimes we just need to spend time in God's presence just for the sake of being in His presence. I think this is where the whole phrase makes sense - we may have to try really hard at the beginning to stop trying so hard in our walk with God.

I'm trying so hard to stop trying so hard.

attitude

Have you ever really thought about how much your attitude plays a role in how you view the events that happen in your life? I came across a quote that I had read before the other day that reminded me of this.

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, then education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company...a church...a home. The remarkable thing is that we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change the past. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens and 90% how I respond to it. And so it is with you...we are in charge of our attitudes...

-Charles Swindoll

There is so much truth contained in those words. The attitude that we choose to have about each day has a huge impact on how we perceive things.

This has challenged in the last few days to really take a look at the attitude that I choose to have each day. The days when I choose to have a bad attitude about things are the days when everything seems to go wrong and I see all the bad in all of it. The days when I choose to have a good attitude are different. Things may still go wrong, but I look at things differently and I see the good in my day.

repentance

I was listening to a speaker at a city-wide missions conference on Sunday night talk about repentance. I have heard messages on repentance before, but this speaker really got me thinking.

OK, before I go on to write about this . . . I have to say how cool it was to be at en event that was put on by many different churches - the Church as whole - coming together to make it happen. It gives whole new meaning and significance to the words of some of the songs we sang that night. I mean, I love the song "God of this City" in the first place, but to sing it with people from other churches in my city was amazing!!! This wasn't just one church declaring the truth - it was the Church as a unified body of believers declaring God the God of our city and that God had greater things yet to do in our city!!! It was just cool!

Back to topic now . . . repentance . . .

The speaker started by giving us a bigger picture of what repentance is. We often hear of it as being a changing of direction - you see your sin and then turn and walk in the other direction from it. But, this guy said that it was more than that, in that it was a complete revolution of the mind. Rather than just walking away from our sin, it's a changing of the way we think. It just made so much sense when he put it that way.

The speaker then moved on to talking about how the church needs to repent of its hiding behind religion. Christianity has wrapped itself in religion, when Jesus never intended for it to be that way. Religion is about following rules and regulations and all that. Jesus talked about faith, not religion. Faith is saying "I trust you" and then acting on it.

I've had those thoughts running around my head since I heard them. And they've really been challenging me. I find it so easy to get caught up in religion - in the things that I "have" to do. It's so much easier to follow rules - to follow a form that sets out how we should live. But, Christianity isn't about that. It's about a relationship with our Lord!