When You Just Want to Avoid Christmas

As I started thinking about Christmas posts earlier this year and planning for what I would write, I had plans of what I would talk about. But, then a few things began happening with my extended family, and all those nice thoughts of Christmas posts went out the window.

The truth is, that as Christmas has approached, I've really wished it would just be done. Most mornings I wake up wishing it was 2019 already, and all of this was done. It's not that I want to skip the celebration of the birth of the promised Messiah, Jesus. It's just that all the rest that comes with Christmas these days is hard this year.

If we could just have the "religious" part of Christmas (for lack of a better word), and leave all the rest, that would be my desire this year. Things have changed in hard ways in my family in the last six months, and that's also emphasized some of the dysfunctional parts of our family that we try to hide. It's been hard and at times I've just wanted to skip it all.

But, as Christmas draws closer, I've been challenged on how I'm responding in the middle of the hard. If I keep focusing on what's hard, then I'm going to dread Christmas and all that comes with it.

But, that doesn't have to be my choice. I can choose to focus on the good things. To focus on the people who are here, rather than the people who won't be on Christmas. To focus on what we're actually celebrating. And to look for the joy and laughter in the midst of it all.

I'm realizing that it really does come down to a choice. And it's my choice. So, even though I still sometimes feel like I just want to avoid all of Christmas, I'm choosing to change my focus for these last days before Christmas.

I don't know where you're at, or what you're thinking about as Christmas approaches this year, but whatever space you find yourself in this year, can I encourage you to think about where you're focusing. Maybe it's fine where it is, or maybe it needs to change.

And, my you find joy and laughter, and the true meaning of what Christmas is all about. Our God came to be with us, to save us.

A Baby Who Changed the World

As Christmas approaches, I keep being drawn back to a post I wrote in 2014. As I've thought about what I might write to share here as I look towards Christmas, I've realized that those words from then are where my heart is at again this year. Rather than write something new, I'm choosing to share those words from four years ago again.

My prayer is they make you think, reflect, wonder at Christmas this year...

_______________________________

As I have been reflecting on the Christmas story this year, I've been struck by how life changing the birth of this one baby was for all people - the night it happened and for all eternity.

One baby changed the world forever. 

Nothing has been the same since that night.

We often talk about how a baby changes everything for the family that baby is born into.

 None brought so much change as Jesus when He was born.

God come to earth.

Immanuel.

God with us.

The One whose life, death, and resurrection would make a way for mankind to once again have direct access to God.

The ultimate expression of sacrificial love. Of humble service.

I wonder if Mary and Joseph, if the shepherds, if the Magi, really understood the significance of that night. They knew what the angels had told them about this baby, but did they really get it? 

A couple thousand years later, do we really get it? Will we ever really get it?

The birth of a baby, named Jesus. 

A baby Who would change everything through His life and death.

The promised Messiah. The One prophesied about.

The One missed by so many when He came because of the way He came.

The One missed by so many while He walked on earth because He came to serve, not to exert His power.

The One missed by so many because He dies a criminal's death to become the greatest sacrifice and defeat sin and death for good.

The One still missed by many today.

But for those who stop to notice . . .

for those who are searching for something more . . .

for those who are willing to be humble and serve . . .

the chance to meat the One Who changes everything.

The One Who offers hope.

The One Who offers forgiveness and a second chance.

The One Who offers unconditional love.

The One Who never fails.

It was one night . . . 

in a stable . . .

in a small town . . .

with two poor parents . . .

surrounded by animals . . .

where the world changed forever.

God put His plan in motion to redeem a fallen world,

to restore a broken relationship with His people.

A plan still in motion today.

A plan that still offers hope today.

A birth.

A baby.

A life lived.

A death.

And the greatest of all - a victory over death, a resurrection.

All because of God's vast, unmeasurable, unchanging, unfailing love for each of us.

That makes it something worth celebrating!

More Reflections on Life Changing in Ways We Don't Always Understand

A few days ago, I shared a poem about some of the hard changes I've been processing with my grandparents recently. That poem was specifically about what I've been walking through with my Grandma, but it's also meant changes with my Grandpa too. This poem is specifically related to that. I'm not actually sure if it's part of the last one, or if it's a new one.

I see you there

With sad in your eyes

The love of your life

Is changing each day

Some days she's angry

And pushes away

Some days she needs you

And pulls you in close

Disease stole her body

And now has her mind

She's here and she's not

So hard to find

I see you there

Loving her still

In pain and in sorrow

You never give up

I listen and watch

I see all you do

It makes me desire

A love like you have

Through life's ups and downs

Endurance has marked it

You hold on for good

You held on in hard

I see you there

Lonely and lost

Crying and hurting

For what has been lost

I'm grateful for you

Your love and your caring

For me through the years

 I cannot forget

Every smile, every hug

 Every prayer that you pray

All the laughter we've shared

It's part of me now

I love much more

Than what I can say

Grandpa, I love you

Is just not enough

When Life Changes in Ways You Don't Understand

As December approached, I had plans for what my posts leading up to Christmas would be about. I was hoping that I would have some thoughts on Christmas and what it looks like as we approach this time.

But, that isn't what happened. As I've been processing life and what some of the things happening in my family mean right now, I've found that I wasn't yet moving towards Christmas in my mind. I was, and am, still processing some changes in my family and relationships with one another.

Often, as I wrestle with changes like this, I find that I turn to poetry as a way to make sense of all that is going through my mind. I don't always share this poetry and I wrestled with whether or not I would share this one. The more I've thought about it, the more pulled toward sharing it I've become.

In these last months I've seen big changes in what it looks like with my grandparents. They've always been an important part of my life, and things look very different now than what they've looked like so far. And it hasn't been an easy journey to be walking. I feel like I've lost so much of what I've always loved and valued with them, even though they're still here. 

This particular poem is part of processing what those changes look like with my Grandma.

I see you there

 Frustrated by what life's become

Betrayed by your mind

Held back by your body

A mind once so alive

Now struggles to understand

A body once so able

Now refuses to do what it should

Golfing, baking, playing with us

You were always there

Laughter and tears, hugs freely given

A safe place to run

Faith always valued

I knew you were praying

Wherever I was

God's love you shared

I see you there

And I love you still

You'll always be with me

Memories deep in my heart

Grandma, I love you

Feels not enough

Words can't express

Just how I feel

I see you there

Waiting for heaven

To be free of these struggles

Fully healed and released

I miss you already

Something doesn't seem right

This world's unfairness

Has stolen your light

I know where you're going

But I'm not ready yet

I want to hold tightly

To not let you go

I treasure it all

Every hug, every smile

Every thing you came to

Every card that you wrote

I see you there

I choose to let go

Trusting our Savior

Who loves you the most