Do you ever those conversations that you know have to have been set up by God?
I had one of those conversations last night. There's a person that I've been avoiding having conversations with for a while . . . a LONG while . . . OK, so it's been like seven years! Anyways, we were dating. Then we broke up . . . and it was messy. So, I've been avoiding him in pretty much any way possible since then. Even to the ridiculous point of going all the way around the church to get somewhere because I would have had ot walk past him to go the more direct way. I must say . . . it has been a little bit ridiculous.
Anyways, on to last night. He was at Alive and afterwards he came up to talk to me and it was a situation where I couldn't avoid having to have a conversation with him. The conversation turned to something that I have really been working through with God recently. As I've seen him around more in the last 8 months or so, I realized that I was avoiding him because in all these years I had never gotten to the point of truely being able to forgive him. God made it clear to me that it was time I did forgive a few months ago and so began a journey that took about a month of getting to that point.
Yet, even after being able to say that I forgave him, I still avoided him as much as possible. Not quite in such ridiculous ways as before but avoided him nonetheless. Until last night . . . there was no way to avoid having a conversation with him, so I decided I could make small talk for a few minutes until I could escape. But, the conversation very quickly turned to the issue of the unforgiveness towards each other that we had both been carrying around for so many years. Needless to say, it ended up being exactly the conversation I needed to have in order to really be able to move beyond that relationship from seven years ago completely.
Last night was definitely one of theose God ordained conversations. Had things gone the way I was hoping I would have avoided anything other than a passing "hello" all evening. But God had other things in store. And, now, I'm glad God did and that He made His plan happen despite what mine was.
Anyways, this has all got me thinking about how often God does this in our lives. I think more often than we maybe give credit God makes those conversations with someone happen because He knows they need to. And, no matter how hard we try to avoid them, He makes His plan happen.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Saturday, August 2, 2008
living in authentic community
So, I'm "suffering" the results of drinking a half a pot of coffee after 8pm. When you don't usually have any caffeine after that time . . . that much coffee can really get you going. My roommates all seem to be going to bed, but I still have too much caffeine in me to even think of sleeping right now. Of course, this all means I will sleep in really late when I do finally go to bed . . . good thing I don't have to be anywhere tomorrow before 6pm. ;)
Anyways, being up and awake has got me started on thinking about something. It seems like God has been teaching me a lot about community and how it should look in the last year. (For previous posts on the topic of community click here or here). I've been thinking about it more tonight, just as I've been reflecting on some things that have happened in my life lately.
I've been realizing that if we completely isolate ourselves from others then when something happens we are often left alone to deal with it on our own. Whereas, when we are living in authentic community with others we have those people that we can call on - whether it's something big or something little. And, I think that is how life is supposed to be lived. We weren't made to go through it on our own.
I've also been thinking a bit about how we typically respond when people call us to help or to care when things go sideways for them. Honestly, I sometimes want to give any excuse in the book not to help. But I'm beginning to realize that it's when I drop the excuses and step out in whatever way that person needs that God shows up in some pretty cool ways. The more I do that, the more I want to do it. But, at the same time I'm always somewhat concerned about how far God will push me in doing those things that I maybe don't want to do, but know that I should be doing to help out those I love and care about - whether friends or family.
I honesty think that one of the major keys to authentic community is that willingness to just be there when someone call. The willingness to put aside your own plans and concerns and be there for the other person - whether it be by listening on the phone, heading over to be with them, or offering help in a practical way. That is the kind of authentic community we are called to live in. And then more that we do that, the more I think we will see God show up in amazing ways.
Anyways, being up and awake has got me started on thinking about something. It seems like God has been teaching me a lot about community and how it should look in the last year. (For previous posts on the topic of community click here or here). I've been thinking about it more tonight, just as I've been reflecting on some things that have happened in my life lately.
I've been realizing that if we completely isolate ourselves from others then when something happens we are often left alone to deal with it on our own. Whereas, when we are living in authentic community with others we have those people that we can call on - whether it's something big or something little. And, I think that is how life is supposed to be lived. We weren't made to go through it on our own.
I've also been thinking a bit about how we typically respond when people call us to help or to care when things go sideways for them. Honestly, I sometimes want to give any excuse in the book not to help. But I'm beginning to realize that it's when I drop the excuses and step out in whatever way that person needs that God shows up in some pretty cool ways. The more I do that, the more I want to do it. But, at the same time I'm always somewhat concerned about how far God will push me in doing those things that I maybe don't want to do, but know that I should be doing to help out those I love and care about - whether friends or family.
I honesty think that one of the major keys to authentic community is that willingness to just be there when someone call. The willingness to put aside your own plans and concerns and be there for the other person - whether it be by listening on the phone, heading over to be with them, or offering help in a practical way. That is the kind of authentic community we are called to live in. And then more that we do that, the more I think we will see God show up in amazing ways.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
stuck in a rut
Do you ever find yourself getting stuck in a rut? Where you have your devotions but it seems to have lost its ability to speak to you? That's where I have been for a while now. It has been a chore to read my Bible, or even to really spend anytime with God.
I'm one of those people where the look of how they spend time with God changes about as often the seasons. I just get bored with one way of doing things and need to do it a bit differently to keep my attention. This is where I was at recently. I had found a way of reading my Bible and hearing from God and I was using it. It was good, but I was getting bored with it so I was just sitting and doing it as fast as I could all the time . . . not exactly a great way to actually hear anything that God may want to say to you. I got stuck on this same way of doing my devotions, if you will, for a lot longer than I usually stick with any one method. It has a couple of years now of the same thing. It was the way that I found helpful when I was just getting my life back to normal after a battle with depression and I think becuase of that I was afraid to let go of this way. Doing things this way had spoken to me a lot during a time in my life where I needed that. But, for the last couple of months, it really hadn't been a good way for me to be doing things anymore - yet, I was still very hesitant to let it go. Needless, to say, when I finally got to the point where I knew that I had to change things, my time with God began to come alive again.
After that, and a couple of conversations I've had recently, I've started to think about we so often end up stuck in a rut in our spiritual lives. For whatever reason we get to a point where we're not learning and we're not hearing from God . . . and so we just go through the motions and keep doing things, even though they mean nothing to us. Most of the time in my experience and the experiences of others I have spoken to, God has to do something drastic in our lives to get us to wake up and get out of the rut we're in. (I'm just thankful that this time around it didn't take that for me.)
I've been wondering why we allow ourselves to stuck in these ruts. I mean, we know when we end up in one, so why don't we just get ourselves out of them? It seems so straightforward when we're not stuck in that rut . . . but it's not as clear when we are in the rut. It just seems strange to me.
I'm one of those people where the look of how they spend time with God changes about as often the seasons. I just get bored with one way of doing things and need to do it a bit differently to keep my attention. This is where I was at recently. I had found a way of reading my Bible and hearing from God and I was using it. It was good, but I was getting bored with it so I was just sitting and doing it as fast as I could all the time . . . not exactly a great way to actually hear anything that God may want to say to you. I got stuck on this same way of doing my devotions, if you will, for a lot longer than I usually stick with any one method. It has a couple of years now of the same thing. It was the way that I found helpful when I was just getting my life back to normal after a battle with depression and I think becuase of that I was afraid to let go of this way. Doing things this way had spoken to me a lot during a time in my life where I needed that. But, for the last couple of months, it really hadn't been a good way for me to be doing things anymore - yet, I was still very hesitant to let it go. Needless, to say, when I finally got to the point where I knew that I had to change things, my time with God began to come alive again.
After that, and a couple of conversations I've had recently, I've started to think about we so often end up stuck in a rut in our spiritual lives. For whatever reason we get to a point where we're not learning and we're not hearing from God . . . and so we just go through the motions and keep doing things, even though they mean nothing to us. Most of the time in my experience and the experiences of others I have spoken to, God has to do something drastic in our lives to get us to wake up and get out of the rut we're in. (I'm just thankful that this time around it didn't take that for me.)
I've been wondering why we allow ourselves to stuck in these ruts. I mean, we know when we end up in one, so why don't we just get ourselves out of them? It seems so straightforward when we're not stuck in that rut . . . but it's not as clear when we are in the rut. It just seems strange to me.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)