the Christian atheist?

I just finished reading a book by the title of The Christian Atheist by Craig Groeschel. The title of the book seemed like a bit of an impossibility to me when I first saw it, but once I read Groeschel's definition of a Christian Atheist and really began to dig into the book, I realized how true that seemingly impossible phrase is.

Usually when we hear the word atheist it is used in reference to someone who doesn't believe in God. Based on that definition, the idea of a Christian Atheist seems a little bit absurd. Groeschel defines a Christian Atheist as someone who believes in God (a head knowledge of God) but lives as if He doesn't exist (God has no impact on daily living for that person). That's something I can say has been true of me at times, and I would guess that many others would also say the same thing about theirs lives. It is actually quite easy to believe in God and yet live as if He doesn't exist. Each chapter in the book talks about a different way we can live like God doesn't exist while still saying we believe in Him, and probably even going to church, Bible study, etc every week.

Christian Atheists believe in God but don't really know Him.
Christian Atheists believe in God but they are ashamed of their past.
Christian Atheists believe in God but they aren't sure God loves them.
Christian Atheists believe in God  but not in prayer.
Christian Atheists believe in God but don't think He's fair.
Christian Atheists believe in God but won't forgive others.
Christian Atheists believe in God but don't think they can change.
Christian Atheists believe in God but still worry all the time.
Christian Atheists believe in God but pursue happiness at any cost.
Christian Atheists believe in God but trust more in money.
Christian Atheists believe in God but don't share their faith.
Christian Atheists believe in God but not in His church.

I don't know about you but when I read that list I can definitely identify with most of them - some more than others. After I read the chapter titles I was rather unsure of what I would find in the book. It would be easy with chapter titles like that for the book to be one that leaves you feeling alone and defeated. But, instead, I found that Groeschel was incredibly encouraging in what he had to say in each chapter. This was a book that spoke of a personal journey for him. That was definitely encouraging to me - to be reminded that these struggles are common to the family of followers of Jesus.

Groeschel ended the book talking about something he called "third line faith". He lays out a picture of three lines drawn in the sand, representing different places we could be on journey with God. Groeschel describes each line better than I could, so I'll quote him here.

Line 1: I believe in God and the gospel of Christ enough to benefit from it. Like so many others, crossing that first line was easy. Sadly, many who call themselves Christians live here. If there is a God, I want to be on his good side. I want to go to heaven. I want him to bless me with good health, good relationships, and a happy life. Like the nine ungrateful lepers in Luke 17, once God helped me, I forgot about him. (pg. 236).
Line 2: I believe in God and Christ's gospel enough to contribute comfortably. Past the first line are people who believe in God not only enough to benefit but also enough to give back - as long as it doesn't cost too much. Many first-line Christians eventually cross the second line. If I don't have to change too much, I'll do some of what God asks. If it doesn't hurt too much, I'll get more serious about God. But everyone has their limits, right? (pg. 236-237).
Line 3: I believe in God and Christ's gospel enough to give my life to it. (pg. 237).

Reading this made sense to me, and challenged me deeply. It really fit in well with the rest of the book for me. I think to close, I will just leave you with the questions that have been in my head since I finished the book - questions that I need to think about and go to God about. Hopefully, they will challenge you to grow in your own journey with God. (And if you're looking for a good read, pick up the book.)

In what areas of my life am I a Christian Atheist? Are there places in my life where I live as though God doesn't exist?
Do I really know God? How can I get to know God better?
Am I ashamed of my past? Will I allow God to redeem my past and use it for His glory?
Do I know that God loves me unconditionally? Am I willing to ask God to help me understand that better?
Do I believe in prayer? Or is it something I think only works for other people?
Do I think that God is unfair? How do deal with things when what has happened in life really doesn't seem fair?
Am I struggling to forgive someone?
Do I doubt that I can change?
Do I still worry all the time? Am I willing to give that up to God?
Am I pursuing happiness at any cost? Or am I pursuing God at any cost?
Am I trusting more in money? Or in God?
Am I sharing my faith?
Am I third-line follower of Christ? Do I want to be? Why?

the unmatchable greateness of God

I was reading in Isaiah when I was struck by just how incredible the God we serve is. God is bigger than we could ever imagine. And there is nothing and no one in all creation that can be compared to Him.

Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand,

or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens?

Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket,

or weighed the mountains on the scales

and the hills in a balance?

Who has understood the mind of the Lord,

or instructed him as his counselor?

Whom did the Lord consult to enlighten him,

and who taught him the right way?

Who was it that taught him knowledge

or showed him the path of understanding?

Surely the nations are like a drop in a bucket;

they are regarded as dust on the scales;

he weighs the islands as though they were fine dust.

. . .

To whom, then, shall we compare God?

What image will you compare him to?

. . .

Do you not know?

Have you not heard?

Has it not been told to you from the beginning?

Have you not understood since the earth was founded?

He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth,

and its people are like grasshoppers.

He stretches out the heavens like a canopy,

and spreads them out like a tent to live in.

. . .

"To whom will you compare me?

Or who is my equal?" says the Holy One.

Lift your eyes and look to the heavens:

who created all these?

He brings out the starry host one by one,

and calls them each by name.

Because of his great power and mighty strength,

not one of them is missing.

Isaiah 40:12-15, 18, 21-22, 25-26 (NIV)

As I been thinking about these verses and the God they describe, I have come to realize how often I try to make God smaller so that I can understand Him better. These verses in Isaiah describe a big God - a God that cannot be compared to anyone or anything - a God that is difficult to fully comprehend.

We spend much of our lives a followers of Christ trying to understand God. There is nothing wrong with this, but we do have the danger that in doing so we actually make God smaller than He is just so that we can feel like we understand Him better. But theses verses and many others describe a God that we will never be able to fully understand.

It is okay that don't completely understand God. In fact, I would say that it is a good thing that we do not completely understand Him. The mystery that comes from God being so much bigger than our minds can comprehend draws us in closer as we seek to better understand.

I think that sometimes we need to just stop and remind ourselves of the fact that we do not completely comprehend God and that it is a good thing. That way we can take comfort in what God has revealed to us about Himself and look forward to continuing to understand God better over the course of our journey through life with Him.

the blessing of family

So far this has been a busy week (this is the first evening I have been home since Friday), but I wouldn't trade it for anything. It's been a week of a lot of stuff with my family, and except for a few moments, I've really enjoyed it all. My sister and her husband have been in town and that means we've had everyone together a lot.

This week I've been reminded again of the incredible family I'm blessed to have - my Mom, my Dad, both of my sisters . . . and now two brother-in-laws. Honestly, at first I thought it would be strange to have two more guys at the table for family dinners, but I love it. My sisters have picked some quality guys and I've enjoyed getting to know them better this week. All to soon, it seems like, Sunday will be here and my sister and husband will head home.

I don't think I've always thought of my family as a blessing. They are days when they drive me up the wall and all I want to do is escape from them. But, I think I've also taken them for granted sometimes. Rather than see how rich I was in having parents and sisters, and now brothers, who were there for me I just kind of assumed that was normal and I deserved that. I'm realizing now that they are a blessing.

I have no idea why God has seen fit to give me such an amazing family, but He has. With my youngest sister and her husband not living here I think I've realized that all the more. I treasure the time that they do come to town for and I treasure the time I get to spend with my other sister and her fiance and my parents. We laugh about silly things and tease each other about stuff we used do, or in some cases still do. We make a point to spend time together just to be together - there doesn't always have to be a reason.

I guess tonight, in the midst of a busy week filled with family, I'm feeling an overwhelming sense of gratitude for my family. They're the people I know that I can count on to be there and the ones I call first with news of any kind. They're also the people who I probably argue with the most and who can annoy me the most, but that's because we are close.

So, to my family, who may read this blog . . . thank you for being who you are. Thank you for all the laughs and tears and for just being willing to enjoy life. You are the biggest blessing in my life. I love you all!!!