The One Thing I Couldn't Find in Scripture

If we hear something often enough, we begin to believe it. Because it become familiar, we decide it must be true and we begin to think and act like it is.

As I studied Scripture on the topic of what it has to say about singleness, I also found I was studying what it says about marriage. You really can't study one without studying the other.

In doing this, I realized that one of the things I've heard often in the larger church body, or at least in certain segments of the larger church body, is actually not what Scripture says. Even an honest searching of the main Scripture pointed to by those who say this didn't convince me that's what it said.

No where in Scripture does it say we have to get married. No where in Scripture does it say singleness cannot be a part of God's plan. No where in Scripture does it say anything about it being a sin to remain single.

Those who have made the argument that the Bible says we have to get married most often point to Genesis 1:28 to support their argument:

"God blessed them and said to them, 'Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground'."

They point to God's Words in the creation account about being fruitful and increasing in number as being a command to get married.

As I dug into how this has been understood by various scholars, I found that the interpretation of this verse was as varied as the scholars I read. The number of ways these words have been understood over the years makes me hesitant to take a firm stance on saying this verse is a requirement for all to get married.

Some of those I read, took this verse as a literal command that all should marry. Others saw it as speaking to a need not to let humanity, or at least Christians today, die out, so if there's a danger of that then marriage is a command in that setting (ie. it would have been a command for Adam & Eve, or Noah and his sons after the flood). Still others saw it as making marriage honourable and important. Some saw it as being no longer relevant because of New Testament examples of Jesus or Paul or others. There were also some who saw this verse as having no relevance to the topic at all.

As I read these varying understandings, the conclusion I could come to was that this verse is not saying that it's a sin or wrong to not get married. There isn't that kind of clarity coming from those who are much smarter than me when it comes to these things.

Looking at the larger picture of Scripture, it also becomes clear that God used single people for His purposes. Jesus was single while He was on earth. So was Paul for a large part of his life and ministry. A lack of being married didn't disqualify them from being used powerfully for God's purposes on this earth.

Yes, it is absolutely true that God value marriage. He created it and has purpose for it. I will never say that's not true. But, it can be important and a beautiful part of God's creation and plan for the world and still not be a requirement for all Christians.

I believe we're on shaky ground when we say it's a sin for people not to get married. I think that places greater emphasis on marriage than on God. It gets our priorities out of order.

As I finish this, I can't think of a better way to end then to offer a quote from Christina S. Hitchcock in her book "The Significance of Singleness":

"We need single people to remind us that the church grows by the power of the Holy Spirit, not by the power of our reproductive organs. Our children are part of that growth, but only insofar as they too participate in the work of the Holy Spirit to bring the good news of Jesus Christ to people of all nations, tribes, and tongues." (pg. 144)

In other words, our focus should be on the great commission as found in Matthew 28:18-20. We should all be making disciples, regardless of our marital status. That's what being fruitful and multiplying means today.